by Tamara Flaherty
I have a burning desire to write, yet I rarely pick up a pen or a keyboard. When I do, it’s usually because I am in the midst of an emotionally challenging time, and if I don’t write something I will explode. What spills out of my keyboard or off of my pen during these times is usually very narrow in its ability to truly reflect all the facets of who I am, but very accurate in describing my current circumstances and emotions.
Writing for me is almost painfully impossible, not because I have nothing to say, but because I have entirely too much to say and I cant figure out where to start. Even when I know exactly where to start, I stop myself, because I am intellectually and emotionally unable to sugarcoat my own reality, and my unvarnished story may cause pain to the central or peripheral characters in my present or past.
So I sit. Stories remain untold, secrets stay buried, memories die, lessons go unlearned, until I make these fingers move.
I am changing my previous course! I have committed myself to writing. I will write, not just during or about the difficult times in my life, but everyday. I will write about all the things that matter to me. Family, politics, life and love. The easy stuff and the hard stuff alike.
This blog is titled Blended Family Chaos for several reasons. The first reason is that, in my experience, all families are chaotic to some degree. The degree of chaos varies from one family to the next and some are better at hiding their own particular brand of chaos than others. Our families, whether our family of origin, or the families we choose, ultimately shape the people we are and determine how we view, engage in, and respond to life and all it’s challenges.
Blended is in the title because the last decade of my life has been spent trying to blend two families that haven’t blended well, resulting in some interesting, hilarious, and sometimes heartbreaking drama. We are like oil and water. You can put oil and water together in the same bottle but they refuse to blend. If you shake things up a little they appear to blend for just a moment but sure enough, they will very quickly separate back into two distinct layers. Its not that oil and water don’t “want” to blend, its that they just can’t!
Water and oil have no natural affinity for each other and cannot blend no matter how long or how often they share a bottle.
The challenge then is to figure out how to peacefully share the “bottle”.
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